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 Kukaro give it a try

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MonicaS

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PostSubject: Kukaro give it a try   Mon 02 Jul 2012, 7:06 pm

Question Today's thought from Hazelden for July 2, 2012 is:

In Micronesian, there's a word, kukaro, which has no corresponding word in English. When people say they are going to kukaro, they mean they are going to relax, sit around, and hang out. They are being, not doing.
--Eli and Beth Halpern

As children, our best times are often trips to an amusement park, fishing at the lake, camping, or just sitting idly under a tree. These make the best memories, and times sitting around a campfire roasting marshmallows or having a root beer after a family outing seem to bring out the love we share.

We don't seem to be accomplishing anything at these times. No chores are getting done around the house, no schoolwork, no repairs, and no moneymaking.

But these times of peace, relaxation, and a sense of endless time of being, not doing, may be essential to our ability to get other things done later. Certainly we are most receptive to our feelings, new ideas, and unplanned adventures at these moments. Maybe we should add kukaro to our vocabulary.

What timeless thing can I do today?
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nannamom
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PostSubject: Re: Kukaro give it a try   Tue 03 Jul 2012, 9:03 pm

I never thought I'd have a hard time in sitting around doing nothing but it's one of the hardest things I have ever tried to do or not do. I always seem to find myself jumping up to do something that I haven't gotten to yet.
With my son just starting work and my other half at work as well, the evenings have become mine so I am going to put more effort into just being.
It does feel good to sit and watch the birds or sit on the porch and watch the leaves on the trees when the wind catches them.
Thanks Monica for reminding me that it's okay to not be busy every waking hour.

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"I will let yesterday end so that today can begin."
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MonicaS

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PostSubject: Re: Kukaro give it a try   Tue 03 Jul 2012, 9:54 pm

I know what you mean. When I was using, it wasn't a problem to be still, but now that I'm in recovery I can't seem to just be either. I always seem to find some reason I need to do something to avoid just being. I think maybe it's because I tend to start to dwell on the past and other unpleasant things if I'm not busy. My counselor says to watch out for spending too much time alone in my head cause it's a dangerous neighborhood, but I know that I need to work on being able to be idle and not get lost in that bad neighborhood if you know what I mean. I guess this is something else I'm going to have to be patient with, I hope that in time I will be able to be completely comfortable just being, but for now I try not to hang out too much in my own thoughts. Part of the problem is my ocd cause once something crosses my mind I can't let it go. I'm working really hard on techniques to redirect my thoughts to more happy places and it seems to be helping. At least I can stand to be alone with my thoughts for more than 10 minutes now and there are some happy thoughts now too. It's weird, in my using, the neighborhood in my mind was darker and more dangerous but I was too numb to be worried about it.
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JohnnyP610

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PostSubject: Re: Kukaro give it a try   Tue 17 Jul 2012, 11:23 am

I tell the newcomer this all the time in AA/NA meetings:

"You have to learn to become comfortable with boredom - sitting still. Afterall, boredom in respect to the chaos of your addiction = PEACE."

Boredom, could be the #1 offender in some cases as to why people relapse... they are unsatisfied with the level of "activity" in their life and they desperately search for "fun" - which leads to them going back out.

Great topic, Monica! Glad to connect on here!
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