Suboxone: The Light At The End Of The Tunnel

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 New to this site, and new to Suboxone...tomorrow :)

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Nature Lover



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Age : 40
Registration date : 2012-08-19

PostSubject: New to this site, and new to Suboxone...tomorrow :)   Sun 19 Aug 2012, 10:28 pm

Hi everyone,

Tomorrow I start Suboxone. I am anxious, but excited as well. I took my last dose of Oxy at 630 this evening, and my induction is at 830a. I take around 40 mgs a day (percocet, not the long lasting) and have been at this same dose for a year, so my doctor said 12 hours should be plenty of time...I took it a few hours early just in case. My doctor is 3 hours away, and it will be a painful drive in the morning, but I know I can do it. I have been reading this forum for a few days and feel very comfortable telling my story, and looking very much forward to be a part of this community. In one of the posts I read, a member was saying how depressed she was 10 days into therapy. The administrator explained that opioids can sometimes supress emotions...which I have known, but never really thought about until now. I know I have some baggage that is going to come up, and I worry about that. However, I do know that I am better off facing it on Suboxone, not Oxy.

So, I started taking Norcos nearly 10 years ago for Endometriosis. I had severe pain, and eventually my first of many surgeries. I was 25 when I had my first surgery, and by the time I was 31 they still weren't able to control my pain or hormone. I was put on numerous hormone therapies, the worst put me into menopause in attempt to kill the bad cells..but it didn't work. The doctors finally started saying that if I was really in that much pain (at the time, I was taking 2-3 10m Norcos/day) then I should have a hysterectomy. I was terrified, and didn't want to do it. I have one beautiful daughter that is now 15, but I wanted more children. I felt backed into a corner. My marriage was over, so I wondered if I would ever have more children anyway. The doctors made me feel like they didn't believe me, even though my cycles were 3 weeks on, one off, and horrible. So, they removed my uterus. This is really the baggage I am worried about. I feel I should have stood my ground, but that is all over and I cannot change it now. But I still feel so sad. I had that surgery four years ago this month, and am still so sad. So anyway, that helped somewhat..but there was significant damage done to my nerves and surrounding tissue during the surgery; one aspect was better, the other was worse. My pain pills increased, my depression increased. A year ago I began Physical Therapy and she talked to me about healing. I never thought I would ever feel better. However, I think I am getting better and stronger, but know that the strong pain meds are holding me back. My pain doc suggested Suboxone a year ago, and I was pissed. I couldn't believe that he thought I was faking my pain or something. So he just slightly backed off, knowing I would come around...thank goodness...I DID! I don't want to be scared of running out of pills, never leaving the house without my pills, never being able to go for a walk without a pill, be around people without a pill...PILLS PILLS PILLS...I am tired of it.

Another thing I learned from reading this site, was that support is imperative. I do not feel confident that my boyfriend is that person. So I called my Dad, who knows a little about this and we talked for hours this afternoon...I told him everything and that I just want to know that I can call if I am having a bad day...that's really my biggest fear; being down and not having that pill to keep me going.

Well, that's all for tonight. Gotta get to bed...big day tomorrow. I will check in when I get home and let you know how it went.

Thank you so much for providing this safe place!



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MonicaS

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Number of posts : 189
Age : 42
Humor : Recovery is a journey to be taken not a destination to be reached.
Registration date : 2012-01-18

PostSubject: Re: New to this site, and new to Suboxone...tomorrow :)   Sun 19 Aug 2012, 11:08 pm

We are all here to help you. Sometimes people have a more difficult time with inductions than others. I think it has a lot to do with your mindset. Do your best to stay positive. You are doing the best thing you can by reaching out for help. You are giving yourself the chance to regain a relatively "normal" life. Without a doubt, recovery is hard at times. If it was easy people wouldn't die from addiction everyday, but by reaching out and building a support network and keeping that network active when things are going well, you will be much more comfortable reaching out when the crap hits the fan. I'm glad that your dad is supportive, but I would suggest that you find someone who has no personal investment in your recovery to be a life line as well. I know that it sounds strange, but sometimes those that love us won't call us on our shit either b/c they are afraid we will go back out and use, or b/c they simply don't understand the ways of addicts well enough to know when we're having problems. The value of one addict helping another is without parallel. Try to get into some f2f meetings of some kind. A word of caution...NA is wonderful and the na steps along with sub have saved my life, but some NA groups aren't very tolerant of people using suboxone so I recommend that you don't bring it up. Try to find someone you can identify with and get lot's of phone numbers.

You will have bad days, no point in lying to you about that, but my worst day now is better than the best day I ever had in my addiction. The bad days help us be grateful for the good ones. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Keep us posted on how you are and if you have any questions please ask. We will do our best to answer them as honestly as possible.
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nannamom
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Humor : Once you choose hope, anything’s possible. -Christopher Reeve
Registration date : 2008-11-09

PostSubject: Re: New to this site, and new to Suboxone...tomorrow :)   Sun 19 Aug 2012, 11:12 pm

Hi Nature Lover,
Let me first say welcome and you are most definitely NOT alone. We are here for you.
Tomorrow is your day. It is normal to be nervous so don't worry. One of the first things I would do is grab some paper and start writing down any questions that you might have for your provider that way you won't forget anything and if you should happen to forget write it down for later.
We will be here when you get home. I am glad that you are able to talk to your dad the way you are. I know it helps me to know that I have family that I can count on.
Please let us know how it goes tomorrow. Someone is usually here off and on during the day and I will make it a point to be here in the morning.
Talk to you soon,
Dee

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"I will let yesterday end so that today can begin."
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Blue Eyes
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Humor : When you know better, you do better....Oprah Winfrey
Registration date : 2012-01-23

PostSubject: Re: New to this site, and new to Suboxone...tomorrow :)   Mon 20 Aug 2012, 7:01 am

Nature lover,

WELCOME to the forum !! And Contratulations on taking your life back !

I know the fear your talking about, fear of being without your pills, fear of having to face the world or the day without a pills. But you take away the fear and guess what? You have FREEDOM!! And that my friend, is a beautiful thing !

You will be in my thoughts today, I know you'll do great.
I cant wait to get to know you more, you'll love it here !

Be strong !!! You can do this !

_________________
Join us for live chat every Tuesday night at 7:30pm EST !!!

NEVER take any online advice over that of a qualified healthcare provider.
Any information you read here should only serve to inspire you to investigate further with credible, verifiable referenced sources or your doctor.
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Nature Lover



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Number of posts : 21
Age : 40
Registration date : 2012-08-19

PostSubject: Re: New to this site, and new to Suboxone...tomorrow :)   Mon 20 Aug 2012, 4:57 pm

Hey eveyone! I am home. I don't feel as great as I hoped. I read so many posts of peoples first days and they said they felt GREAT. However, I could feel worse, and I could be taking pills instead of recovering!

My doctor only administered .5mg at the office. By the time that occurred, I felt pretty bad. After about 15 minutes I was almost asleep! I maybe got 3 hours of sleep last night, as I had to wake up at 430 to get to his office in time. He promises me that taking it slow like this is the best way to do it. I have researced his practice, and I know he is well respected...however...I felt pretty bad by the time I got home. I just took my second dose before logging on..1mg this time. I am suppose to do the exact same tomorrow but it stinks because I was so sick & worn out prior to this second dose. I do a bit better now. Anyhow, my Rx is written for 1mg/ 3-4X daily as needed. I am really worried about taking it too late and not being able to sleep (yet another great idea I learned on this site!) and I hope to try to keep it to only 2-3 doses/day. Doc says this works best for patients in pain, I wonder if he isn't just making sure I have a "pill" to take more often than once a day. I see him again in 3 weeks and we may change it then. What do you all think of this? Anyone been on this kind of schedule?

And thank you ladies so much for your encouraging words. I thought today, "THIS IS MY DAY"
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Blue Eyes
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Humor : When you know better, you do better....Oprah Winfrey
Registration date : 2012-01-23

PostSubject: Re: New to this site, and new to Suboxone...tomorrow :)   Mon 20 Aug 2012, 5:57 pm

I'm sorry your not feeling great.

First, I'm not a doctor, but I don't feel your taking enough. He's telling you to go at 1mg increments each time you dose? That's not a whole lot. Your not saturating your receptors yet, so that's why your not feeling good.
I induced at home and I started with 4mg, then added another 4mg 1hr later. Then I felt great for most of the day.

I dont get the 1mg 3-4 x's a day.

We are having chat tonight. It might be good if you could join us.
7:30 pm EST. I know Dee will be there (a little late, but she'll be there ) she's our Administrator and has years of experience. I would like to hear her opinion of this.

And just for the record, taking it late, never interupted my sleep

_________________
Join us for live chat every Tuesday night at 7:30pm EST !!!

NEVER take any online advice over that of a qualified healthcare provider.
Any information you read here should only serve to inspire you to investigate further with credible, verifiable referenced sources or your doctor.
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Nature Lover



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Number of posts : 21
Age : 40
Registration date : 2012-08-19

PostSubject: Re: New to this site, and new to Suboxone...tomorrow :)   Mon 20 Aug 2012, 6:11 pm

Blue Eyes,

Do you think that is why I am so tired too? Or just lack of sleep and not feeling good? After 1mg I felt OK for about 20 mins and then into sleep.

Also, I only increase on day 3. So the same thing in the morning (.5mg) and that wasn't cool....at all Sad I don't get this schedule but believe it must have something to do with why I feel so different my first day than everyone else. I am bummed to feel so yuck & have no energy at all. So, it seems my max dose a day will be 4 mg, but taken too often. grrr I am not thrilled about this. No worries, not discouraged enough to think its not right for me to do, just thinking it will take me a good while to figure out a dose/schedule to make me feel better. As long as I am awake, I will join the chat. Funny...I thought it was going to cause me problems sleeping haha!
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Blue Eyes
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Humor : When you know better, you do better....Oprah Winfrey
Registration date : 2012-01-23

PostSubject: Re: New to this site, and new to Suboxone...tomorrow :)   Mon 20 Aug 2012, 6:27 pm

I definatly dont think 4mg is right.

I'm on 12mg now.
I know they say you have to be on the lowest dose to keep you from feeling withdrawal and cravings, and that's not whats happening for you,

I hope to see you in an hour, Dee will be there and we all can help you figure this out

_________________
Join us for live chat every Tuesday night at 7:30pm EST !!!

NEVER take any online advice over that of a qualified healthcare provider.
Any information you read here should only serve to inspire you to investigate further with credible, verifiable referenced sources or your doctor.
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MonicaS

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Female
Number of posts : 189
Age : 42
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Registration date : 2012-01-18

PostSubject: Re: New to this site, and new to Suboxone...tomorrow :)   Mon 20 Aug 2012, 9:31 pm

I too am not a dr. but I do think that I may have an explanation for why the dr. is taking you up at such small increments. In my opinion, his reasons are probably two fold. First the small dose for the first 3 days will avoid you having percipitated withdrawal syndrome. The dr. may have had several patients that weren't sufficiently in w/d when they induced so he's learned to be cautious, after all, addicts generally aren't so great at following dr.s orders. Second, by increasing you on day 3 he is virtually assured that there will be no short life opiates (ie hydrocodone, oxycodone) left in your system to compete with the buprenorphine and therefore on that day you will receive the maximum effect. I have to say that I have never heard of this, but if it works, you will end up taking the lowest possible dose. It could also have something to do with the amount of opiates you were using, some dr.s base starting doses on that. It could be any number of things, but as you said this dr is a respected physician in the field so I believe you are right in trying to adhere to his schedule. With that being said I agree with blue that 4mg probably won't be enough to stabilize you and if you are still feeling "yuck" after you get there, please call the office and let them know. It takes 5-7 days for a dose change to take effect completely so keep that in mind. Also, b/c of the long half life, your buprenorphine level will gradually increase. But like I said, if you don't feel better within say 10 days call the office and see if they will see you sooner. You don't want a dose that is too low to lead you to leave the program, because as you've read already suboxone is a life saver. I hope this helps. I wasn't able to get to the chat tonight b/c I was busy with my kids, but if you need me send me a pm. I will be on here most of the day tomorrow. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
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nannamom
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PostSubject: Re: New to this site, and new to Suboxone...tomorrow :)   Tue 21 Aug 2012, 3:57 pm

Hi naturelover,
I have been posting on the wrong post it seems. Here all of you are. I found you Smile

Maybe Monica is right about your doctor and the extra low dose thing. Not all patients are alike. I had never heard of a doctor dosing at .5mg
2mg yes but now .5
With the long half life of Suboxone it will build up in your system over the course of this week. I believe what you are feeling is still some of the withdrawal. Not being a doctor I am not supposed to technically say that though.
I hate to see you feeling so crappy and I don't want the crappiness to discourage you about your treatment.
If the doctor hasn't called you back yet, he may wait until after patients this afternoon.
Please keep us posted.
I did post to you in another area where you posted before so please don't think I forgot about you.
Dee

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"I will let yesterday end so that today can begin."
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Nature Lover



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Number of posts : 21
Age : 40
Registration date : 2012-08-19

PostSubject: Re: New to this site, and new to Suboxone...tomorrow :)   Tue 21 Aug 2012, 4:22 pm

Hi Dee,

I responded in the other post to your post. I started off in here yesterday but then moved into the suboxone section today so that maybe more people would see it, as opposed to being in the intro? I don't know if that was the right thing to do. So I did speak to him and he agrees I am in withdrawl but said take another half and call us in the morning to see how you feel. I vomitted before I spoke to him and was very upset. I took the other half and that has kept me out of the bathroom, but I am seriously on edge and feel soooo bad. Also, I have been either swallowing or spitting out the salivia from under my tongue and in my mouth and drinking water right after I take my dose. Therefore, I have probably be getting very little of my very little dose. I am so angry that he never said a word about how important that is. I am in serious withdrawls and this feel horrible. He knows my situation so I think I may continue to take 1mg an hour (he said you are suppose to wait 90 mins between doses) until I get this under control. He didnt tell me to do this, but he knows I am sick and I will explain in the morning that due to his lack of instruction and low doses, I am sicker than I should have ever been. I am so upset.
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nannamom
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PostSubject: Re: New to this site, and new to Suboxone...tomorrow :)   Tue 21 Aug 2012, 4:48 pm

I don't blame you for being upset. More often than not doctors don't really explain things completely to their patients and they should. There is no sense in that at all. It doesn't take long to make sure a patient understand what or how they are supposed to take their medication.
It gets to me because I have been there and i get to the point where I care about the patients so much and I know how Suboxone can work when taken properly.

I can't say that I don't agree with you. If I were you I would probably do the same thing.
I will sit here all night with you if need be. This is vacation week so I don't have anywhere I need to be right now.
Waiting between doses allows you to see if that dose is going to hold you. If you take it and hold it under your tongue for the proper amount of time it may do the trick. You can only try.
NO drinking, eating or talking remember.
Let me know

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"I will let yesterday end so that today can begin."
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Blue Eyes
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PostSubject: Re: New to this site, and new to Suboxone...tomorrow :)   Tue 21 Aug 2012, 7:31 pm

Hi Nature,

Your getting good advice between Dee and Monica, so I'll just offer my support !
I'm here for you if you need.

I agree with you on taking 1mg per hour untill you feel better.
You have to let the meds do it's thing, but you have to enough of it in your body !

Remember what Dee said, wait 30min after caffine, and smoking before taking your sub and no talking or swallowing while its disolving.

We are here for you ! Your not alone~

_________________
Join us for live chat every Tuesday night at 7:30pm EST !!!

NEVER take any online advice over that of a qualified healthcare provider.
Any information you read here should only serve to inspire you to investigate further with credible, verifiable referenced sources or your doctor.
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MonicaS

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PostSubject: Re: New to this site, and new to Suboxone...tomorrow :)   Thu 23 Aug 2012, 2:07 pm

Nature,
I'm so sorry that I've not been here in a few days. Like dee said your dr. should have explained the most effective way to dose to you, especially given that he was starting you out so low. I don't understand why drs don't take the time they should to explain it to patients, but I honestly believe that some of them don't know themselves. Unfortunately, there are many physicians out there who have jumped on the treatment bandwagon and seen it as a financial windfall. You said your dr. had a good reputation, but if he treats other patients as he has you, I wonder where that would have been acquired. I'm sorry that you are feeling so horrible, please keep us posted and hopefully the tips you received here on appropriate dosing will help with your symptoms. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
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